Posts in Personal Growth

Have you ever felt like you didn’t exist? Like you were walking through life unseen — not because you wanted to be invisible, but because others simply refused to see you?

I believe that the way we frame the question "What is love?" is often fundamentally misguided. Many people, when they seek to understand love, are really asking what it means when someone shows it to them: when they say, "I love you," when they give attention, care, affection, or gifts...

What a freaking cocktail of subjects I am. Sometimes it seems to me that I am a classic specimen for studying many topics, such as the rupture of relationships with my father at a tender age, merging with my mother, and the subsequent desire to reunite with her as one whole in mature relationships, even with the opposite sex, global beliefs in my own inadequacy and the refraction of perception of reality, observed through these ‘rose-colored’, or rather, black glasses. Well, and so on.

There are three types of kindness. The Kindness That’s Asked For The first type of kindness is the one a person needs and asks for.

I’ve made a decision I won’t walk back: From now on, the way a person communicates will be the primary factor I use to decide whether I trust them—especially if they are a therapist, coach, or guide.

For a long time, I believed I loved people. But recently, I admitted something that initially felt harsh, even misanthropic: I don’t. At least, not in the way I thought I did.

Self-love is equivalent to the absence of self-hatred, it’s a state of human consciousness that can be described as “simple” – devoid of self-flagellation, self-rejection on any level, constant self-reflection, self-criticism, self-punishment, and lack of self-respect.

“Shame derives its power from being unspeakable. That's why it loves perfectionists—it's so easy to keep us quiet. If we cultivate enough awareness about shame to name it and speak to it, we've basically cut it off at the knees. Shame hates having words wrapped around it. If we speak shame, it begins to wither.”

We are so dependent on external conditions. One moment, something isn’t right; the next, we feel something’s missing. And we get so angry that this doesn’t get fixed or that doesn’t arrive — because our happiness is tied to this and that. I’m not saying anything new, but for me, understanding this has recently reached a whole new level.

I recently read an article describing mothers who once did things in raising their children — and now “deny” any responsibility. The comments below it were full of outrage, calling out such parents who can’t admit how cruel or damaging their behavior sometimes was, acting as though nothing ever happened.